Let us help you find your next job, Conan!

Dear Conan,

It’s come to our attention that you may be in the market for a new job (we have our sources). First, let us assure you that, in this economy, you’re not alone. With you joining the ranks of the jobless, there are now 15.3 million and 1 unemployed Americans.

It could be a little while before you return to TV, so we thought this would be a great chance to try out a new career, and maybe even a temporary job or two. And we don’t mean temporary like your last job.

At Adecco, we work to place people across all professional backgrounds and skill sets, and we think you’d be a great fit with any one of our clients. You’ve got some highly marketable skills, such as:

A great network
– You’ve got a rolodex filled with people who have connections that would love to help you out. You’re also great at interactive media—who ever imagined a web site about a libidinous manatee would take off the way it did?

Interviewing skills
– Everyone knows this is one of the most important parts of the job search process, and you’ve been conducting interviews on a nightly basis for years. Note—you may want to refrain from your impressions of the boss until after you land the job.

A strong professional background
– You’ve been pretty busy for the last couple of years, and you went to a good school, but it looks like it’s time to dust that resume off because, let’s face it; it probably hasn’t been refreshed since the year 2000.

We’ve also decided to launch a survey that will allow us people of the earth help pick your next job. To view the results, just visit www.ConansNextJob.com. We’ve even included an option that you and Andy can do together since he’ll need a job too. The website will also include a link to thousands of other great Adecco jobs that we’re sure your staff will love, too.

While we think you handled leaving your previous job very well, we also feel we can offer you some valuable insight into helping you find your next one. Trust us; we do this for a living—500,000 times a year worldwide.


Adecco Group NA

P.S. For the record, we love the hair—you just may want to tone it down on that next interview.

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